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SavingSupergirl

A storyteller. Writing since 2004.

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Musings

These Empty Words

Originally written 081813.
Continued 093013.
Finished 030514.

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I wish I could tell you how beautiful the weather is this morning. I have been trying to wake up early since the community quarantine started - - 8-ish, so I could be at the roofdeck by 8:30. Darel and I have been convinced that our bodies could benefit from the morning sunshine, but unfortunately he can't come up here often as much as I do because of his morning allergies. Honestly, I'm not doing it merely for the vitamin D. I love the view up here. I could see some trees, the blue sky, the clouds. When I'm lucky, I get to have a cool morning breeze to accompany me as I read. I'm currently trying to finish Robin Sloan's Sourdough. It's the first time I get to have this kind of morning breeze in the past days I have been here. It's already summer so on most days it's just purely heat, without much wind. However, today is different. Somehow the wind is consistent and it feels like I am almost by the beach, with the wind on-going non stop. In fact, I could almost smell the sea. Right now, I am tempted to skip on my reading and just take a nap. I can't help but to smile, with my eyes closed, and just feel the wind. The birds are happily chirping in the background. I could also hear the rustling of the tree leaves. Some of you know how I have been struggling with my faith in the past couple of months. Or maybe almost a year. I have been in a constant battle with the God whom I felt have failed me in so many ways. When all I did was to obey Him for the past 6 years, all He did was take things away from me, and make me feel betrayed, unappreciated, not good enough, and useless. I have been nursing wounds which I thought was already more than what I can bear. And instead of God helping me heal those wounds, He seems to just allow more of it to come. It was difficult. I would always have to battle with my own thoughts and of what my theology is. I would always find myself confused with the questions, "Is this still the God I know? God will never contradict Himself, right?" I know God's promises but for many reasons, I seem to have lost sight of it. In fact, I don't want to...(continued on the blog) . . // Maybe Some Days Are Just Really Sunny //

MEAL PREP!! . It has always been my struggle to cook food for me and Darel. Not because I don’t know how but mainly because it’s really hard to cook just for two persons! And besides, almost everything you buy in the groceries usually comes in big sizes, hindi lang for two. Honestly, hindi talaga ako sanay bumili sa palengke (although I try to shop there every once in a while), so I had no choice but to buy whatever that is available in the grocery. . Before, dahil mahirap makahanap ng recipes na good for two lang, I will cook a meal and then sobrang daming matitira. Eventually we have to dispose leftovers na kasi hindi na namin kaya yung “umay” sa paulit ulit na pagkain at nasisira na lang talaga yung food. . But that was then, when I haven’t tried meal prepping yet. Soooo. Here’s why make-ahead meals work quite well for me: . 1. Lessens the need to cook everyday + more time to do other things. If you know us well ni Darel, we usually just eat two heavy meals in a day. Medyo nahirapan talaga ako sa set-up namin because ako, I prefer to have brunch and dinner. Si Darel naman, kelangan breakfast and lunch dahil madalas oats lang ang gusto nya sa gabi. So paano, diba? Ang hirap nung magluluto ako ng dinner tapos ako lang din naman yung kakain. . Aside from that, nakakapagod yung kada meal magluluto ka. Iba yung pagod from cooking sa pagod ng paghugas ng mga pinaglutuan mo. Maglilinis ka pa ng bahay. Haha. So atleast with meal preps, I cook like full-on luto only once a week. Yung iba, like specifically for breakfast gaya ng eggs, omelette, hotdogs, ganyan, madali lang naman yun so I don’t consider that as full-on luto. And besides, we have an air fryer to help me with that. If you can, I encourage you to invest in an air fryer. Sobrang laking tulong, plus no oil pa. FYI: I define full-on luto with the use of a lot of ingredients. Yung may mga timpla-timpla pa. . 2. We can eat healthier + saves us money. Ang problem ko talaga with the fact na oats lang ang prefer ni Darel pag gabi, I often end up eating fried food... (continued on the blog) . . Here’s Why Make-Ahead Meals Work Quite Well For Me (plus 2 recipes that costs only 130PHP or less per serving)

HAHAHAHA. Buti na lang funny ka. Love you, @djnajjj. 😂 Walang pilitan na nangyari. Inaya ko lang siya kumanta, game agad siya. Also, yung "mahirap" niya naging "mahirrrrrraaap". Haha! Dati si Rafa yung tinuturuan ko kumanta, ngayon si Darel James na lang.

If there's one thing I've been constantly learning since the start of the year, it would be about not being too hard on myself and that it's okay to do things one day at a time. Last month, whenever I would find myself struggling with unproductive or high anxiety days, I would just try to comfort myself by thinking, "It's okay. We can try again tomorrow." . I am thankful for my husband, friends and new found people (especially the Wordpress community) who never failed to remind me that it's okay to admit that you're not okay. We all go through difficult seasons in life, and if you keep on putting a front that you are fine even if you're not, you will eventually die -- literally and/or figuratively. And as much as I want to have answers on why I am experiencing such, I have no choice but to just allow life to run its course (continued on the blog) . . // February 2020: Taking It One Day At a Time //

It’s almost 4PM, and we all agreed to meet up in the lobby. We’re off to see Otaru Canal, a popular tourist spot here in Hokkaido, and right now I have no idea what’s so special about it. We went out of the hotel and started walking. We have decided to take the bus going to Otaru because cab fares are so expensive, so the first thing we need to do is to get to Otaru Eki Mae Bus Terminal. What we didn’t know is that Japan has a not-so-easy-to-understand address system, especially in Sapporo. . Google Maps pointed us to walk towards a specific location and the only English word we could make out from the directions was “4 chōme”. So we thought, “Okay, let’s just follow the walking directions and we’ll get there safe and sound”. When we got to the place which was supposedly be 4 chōme, we cannot find any signage indicating that we are indeed in 4 chōme. So we continued to walk, and walk, and walk, until we realized that we’ve been walking for almost an hour already and we still cannot find the bus terminal. . It was getting frustrating, because we know that we’ve been following Google Maps and yet we have no idea if we are really getting to the right place. I later found out that chōme is just an indicator of the distance of the block from the city center – the east-west distance to be more specific, while the north-west distance is indicated by jō. No wonder we cannot find a place called 4 chōme. I also later found out from a friend that Google Maps isn’t really reliable when you’re in Japan. But that was after we got lost too many times in this trip. . It’s almost 5 o’clock in the afternoon and we are now in Tokeidai Mae bus stop after numerous lefts and rights on the random streets of Sapporo. I guess Google Maps re-routed us to this bus stop instead because we are nowhere near Eki Mae bus terminal. But who said our dilemma already ends here? We now have to figure out what specific bus to ride in this bus stop. There are no English signs on the bus, so that means we will just depend on the arrival time of the Otaru... (continued on the blog) . . // Finding the Way to Otaru Canal: Understanding the Complex Address and Transpo System of Sapporo, Hokkaido //

It's a blessing to witness my grandmother celebrate her 90th birthday, together with my husband. Trivia: I'm the 2nd apo who got married. At her age she's still physically strong, and her memory is still very sharp. Still witty too! Praying for more wonderful years ahead of you, inay!

What a privilege to be secondary sponsors at #ChrisMoSiAngel's wedding! It was a good and beautiful day to witness Chris and Angel's union, and at the same time to channel my inner Seo Dan. Hahahaha. . How to be Seo Dan: 1. Long black hair 👩 2. Ribbon tie blouse 🎀 3. Hair clip ✨ 4. Boots 👢 5. Bote ng alak 😂 6. Find yourself an Alberto ❤️ . Also, can I just say that my skirt has pockets? Haha. I live for dresses with pockets! Thank you, ate Salve (who doesn't have an ig) for making it on such short notice. I'll definitely use the top again and again because these are separates! . . #CrashLandingOnYou #SeoDan

Even though I just slept during the entire flight, I still found myself very sleepy inside the cab. Maybe it's the calming sight of the snow on the streets of Hokkaido that lulled me to sleep. I have no idea how far the hotel is, so I thought it might be good to just seize the moment for a quick nap. I know. I've already had lots of it this morning. But when you're in a vacation, there's no such thing as too much sleep - - for me, at least. . I was still hesitant at first, because my sister-in-law, who was sitting beside me at the back seat, is already fast asleep, and now I don't know if my husband, who was sitting in front beside the driver, have plans to take a nap as well. And so I was worried. In the country where I am from, it will never be a good idea to fall asleep in a cab, whether you're a foreigner or a local. But this is Japan, I thought. What could possibly go wrong with the three of us sleeping all at the same time? So, I risked it. . I was not surprised when the cab finally pulled up outside the hotel. I knew it. The 2019 Global Peace Index wasn't kidding when they said that Japan is on the list of the Top 10 Peaceful Countries in the World - - the 9th to be exact. Meanwhile, my country, the Philippines, is ranked 134th. Good job. We're still safer compared to 29 other countries, with Afghanistan being the most dangerous. We should all visit Iceland though. They're the number one when it comes to safety. Also, yes. I'm talking about GPI just because of a sleeping in a cab incident. . After the driver assisted us with our luggages, he said his thanks, and so did we. I faced the hotel. It's a large building with revolving doors for its entrance. I quickly went inside because I am beginning to feel the cold, and I do not have my coat on. I took it off earlier inside the cab. I did not have enough time to have a glimpse of the surrounding buildings because I was thinking I could do that later, after we have checked in to our rooms . Once you enter the hotel, you'll be greeted by a very spacious lobby with a high ceiling. There's a planter box separating the... (continued on the blog) . . // Exploring Sapporo, Hokkaido: Hoping For A Snowfall //

Didn't know we'll be matchy matchy today. Tulog pa ko ng umalis siya eh. Haha. 💕

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