What I Meant When I Said, “I Will Fight For This Marriage.”

The night before I got married, I was having a hard time composing my wedding vow. Funny how most people thought that I got it all figured out weeks before my big day, because they know that I love to write. Ang di nila alam, I slept late that night as I try to put into words everything I feel and I’m thankful for. Sinave ko nga lang sa phone ko yung vow ko, quite unsure if memorize ko na ba kasi 11pm na nun at kailangan ko na matulog. So ayun, nung vow moment na the next day, hindi ko na alam kung nasabi ko ba lahat ng sinulat ko the night before. Good thing we have a raw copy of the video of the ceremony (c/o Imagine This Creatives) so I was able to get my exact words and share it to you today.

“First of all, I want to say that I love you, and words or any video is not enough to express how thankful I am na finally andito na tayo.

Kagaya ng alam ng karamihan dito, three years ago (well this should be six pala kasi 3rd year na namin ni Darel haha), I was broken beyond repair, and my life was completely changed through the process of my healing. I’m so thankful na God saw me first and made it a point to renew my heart and my life bago kita nakilala. I’m thankful everyday for your life. Thank you for making me happy, for making me sad, and for other emotions. Thank you for making me brave in so many ways.

I want to keep this short kasi pwede ko naman sabihin sa Instagram yung iba. So, I just want to promise you one thing, and that is to fight for you, fight for us. I promise to fight for this marriage kahit na yung palaging sinasabi ng mundo is ang dali lang mag give up. So in front of these people, and with God as our witness, I will love you, not only today, tomorrow, but until the day that we’ll see Jesus face to face. I praise God for this day. I love you.”

Unlike other wedding vows, I skipped the many promises and just summarized it in a single one. I vowed to fight for this marriage, and this is what I meant when I said that:

I’ve always been told that to make marriage work, you need to persevere and work hard together. They say that it takes the effort of both the husband and wife so they can keep the commitment they made to each other and above all, their covenant to God. I have noted these tips in my mind and told myself that I can’t wait to see how these things will become reality in my married life. Well, six months later, here I am and I want to add things that I’ve learned and I’m continuously learning.

Fighting for your marriage doesn’t happen when something comes up along the way and creates a tension in the relationship, thus there’s the need to save the marriage. It also doesn’t just start when the love is slowly starting to fade. I’m continuously learning that fighting for your marriage is also waking up everyday thinking how you will honor God by loving your spouse. It’s part of those moments when you feel like your self-centeredness is kicking in and you think more of what you deserve more than what you can do to serve. It’s when you let go of pride and hate, and allow your spouse to tell you the things you need to hear. It also involves serving your spouse in truth, love and grace. It’s the little things that make a good weapon for a good fight.

Yesterday, Darel and I were able to spend some quality time as we visited Antipolo, and we really enjoyed our “date”. (Click HERE for more photos of our Antipolo date ♥) I’m thankful because of how timely it was as I realized that fighting for your marriage is also making time for each other, no matter how busy you both are, and making sure that you fill each other’s love tank.

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Fighting for your marriage doesn’t happen at the end, or in the middle, but at the start. Yung iba siguro iniisip na kabago-bago nyo pa lang mag-asawa, anong alam nyo sa fighting for marriage? Haha! Well, I believe that the duration of your relationship as a married couple is not an issue, because fighting for marriage happens everyday, and every decision you make will contribute to your cause of keeping your marriage strong and pleasing to God.

What are the ways you can fight for your marriage today?

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