I had a client meeting in Eastwood one Thursday morning. After taking a bath, I got dressed, did my usual skin care routine, and left. While in the car, I decided to just put on my face sunscreen and nothing more. When I got to the client’s office, we discussed the project, and after an hour we were already done with the meeting. On my way home, I was thinking, “Wow. I survived a meeting with no make-up on.” Hahahaha.
It was only last year when I started to learn how to do a full-on face make-up. Getting back from our honeymoon trip, which was basically spending 3 weeks jumping from one island to another, my skin was literally toasted. I was also having a bad case of acne breakout since December 2017, so I really had to learn how to cover my blemishes. (Thank God for derma, because I had a good skin on my wedding day. Hahaha)
At first, there was no room for lazy days to not wear make-up. I wasn’t used to having breakouts so it really had an effect on my self-esteem. Yes, wearing no make up during those times made me feel really ugly. I would argue with my husband for rushing me every time we need to go out, because he doesn’t give me enough time for my face. HAHA. I went gaga over skin care, researching what should come first – like hello, serums or moisturizer??, and disciplined myself to become diligent in my routine. I used to be your typical any-soap-will-do-as-facial-cleanser type of girl, but I guess my skin evolved and started to become too sensitive, hence the need to invest in good cleansers.
Well, I guess my face started to love me back again. It eventually calmed down. I’m so thankful it did because I realized that I’m too lazy to continue this make-up dependency, the same way I got too lazy to wear contact lenses everyday so I settled for eyeglasses instead. That particular meeting made me realize that taking care of your skin doesn’t automatically make you “maarte”. Because if feeling good and looking good would help you to become comfortable with yourself, then there’s no doubt that you can give your best in doing the things that you need or even love to do. I know that beauty isn’t all about appearance, but there’s also nothing wrong in learning how to be able to present yourself well. What’s scary is when you anchor your whole identity in this idea of “beauty”.
Y’know what, I have days when I would feel really insecure about how I look. Honestly, I think most of my days are like that. Haha. But then, there are also days when I would feel like blah and not give so much attention on my appearance. I would think, “Eh ano naman kung maging sobrang maganda nga ako, na walang akong flaws sa katawan? Ano bang matutulong nun sa buhay ko?” I would find myself asking these questions: Does being beautiful equate to having a good life? Does the absence of any flaw in your body mean you will have no problems and struggles? I don’t think so. But hey, of course, being beautiful has its perks. Sabi nga nila diba, “Dibale ng walang pera, basta maganda.” Hahahaha. Alam nyo, I don’t really know why I’m suddenly talking about these things when all I wanted to say was, “I am kinda proud of myself for being able to go to an important appointment, bare-faced”.
At 30 years old, I’m at this point where I’m kinda evaluating my values and my perspective in different areas of life. Haha. Here we go again. Some people say that I’m too “deep”, and that I think so much of “deep” things and that sounds kinda boring. That is so true. But if I’m not going to think about “deep” stuff now, then when is the right time to think about these things? When I’m already 40 or 50, and it’s more difficult to adjust or change whatever needs changing in my life? I used to believe in YOLO, but you know what, that’s exactly the point. We only live once. If we live our lives based only on what’s on the surface of the things we believe in, and not really dig deeper on the why we believe and do such things, I’m afraid we all could be missing out a lot.
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